I post in the midst of the anxiety brought on by my perfectionism.  do I think I am perfect? no. so why do I struggle? because of people pleasing. why do I people please? because people are so unpleasant when not pleased. duh? my current life situation is a new job, a family member (in-law) who feels I do nothing right and need their constant instruction to put one foot in front of the next on one side. the other side stands a family member who, by their own admission says it is their job to keep everyone happy.  welcome to my influential shit-storm.  I won’t live by either of their rules. I won’t yet they influence me.  Elkhart Tolle said something like frustration is not aceepting what is…..but then he has never met these two.  I’m not sure what to accept because I’m still unsure of who I am in relation to their issues.  hey, at least I call them ‘their issues’, I mean those are clear to see.  Now….to figure out mine….once the energy drain of anxiety calms….or maybe that’s the point. the anxiety-drain forces me to slow….and think….**deep breath** oh these growing pains. 

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