Funerals, they can be so odd.  We said good-bye to a family member this week.  One moment they are here and the next, gone.  Life is a mixed bag of blessings and regret.  The last thing I had said about this person was to call them an asshole.  I had my reasons and if  they had lived I wouldn’t regret them but because this person died then I want to take them back.  Why?  When they were here I never wanted to spend more time with them than the allotted family gathering but now, in the afters, I wish I had known the person better.  So who am I?  Do I mourn my hindsight?  Or just accept that this is life.  I had my reasons to say what I said and think what I thought.  Death changes our perspective, but why?  Is it because we live in the chance tomorrow will bring while ignoring the fact that this moment is it?  But can we live in that reality?  Can we truly understand what it means?  Maybe, just maybe, our humanness cannot comprehend the moment until it becomes the memory?

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